


Shouldn't You Be In Love With Your Best Friend Anyway

by decentlysane



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Best Friends, Bisexual Harry Potter, Bisexual Male Character, Bisexuality, Canon Divergence, Coming Out, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Not Epilogue Compliant, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:28:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27430498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/decentlysane/pseuds/decentlysane
Summary: Even in the dark room, lit only by the full moon hanging outside the window, Harry could see concern begin to creep across Ron's freckled face. "You look rough.""Thanks, Ron. You don't look to pretty yourself right now.""No, I meant you look shaken." His tone was somewhere between irritation and worry. "Why couldn't you sleep?"Harry shrugged. "No reason." His voice pitched slightly. He cringed.Ron fixed him with a hard look. "You don't have to lie to me you know," he said. "I remember what it was like after our fourth year. You're having nightmares again, aren't you?"Harry cast his gaze to the floor, feeling embarrassed. Was he really so obvious? Could everyone tell that he was still being haunted by what happened? Or did Ron just know him too well?
Relationships: Harry Potter/Ron Weasley
Comments: 8
Kudos: 138





	Shouldn't You Be In Love With Your Best Friend Anyway

Harry woke to his heart pounding against his chest, his forehead damp with sweat.

Nightmares. Again.

They were a lot better, now. They weren't accompanied by his scar flashing with pain. They weren't so vivid that he completely confused them with reality while they were happening- there was always the knowledge as they happened, somewhere in the back of his mind, that it was a dream. But they felt real enough to send adrenaline coursing through his veins, his body ready to fight of flee, the high, cold laugh echoing through his mind.

They had been coming nightly, now.

 _Voldemort is gone,_ he reminded himself, taking a few calming breathes to ground himself. _You're safe. Your friends are safe. The world is safe._

Though his heartbeat slowed, Harry felt very much awake and knew there wasn't going to be much point in continuing to lie in his sleeping bag. Craving something comforting, he resolved to go downstairs and fix himself some tea. Molly wouldn't mind, so long as he cleaned up after himself. He could hear Ron's soft snores from the bed next to him. Carefully, so as not to wake his friend, Harry rose from where he lay and shuffled across the floor.

When he reached the door, he let out a sigh of relief that he hadn't disturbed Ron. As he opened the door, however, the hinges squeaked and Ron stirred. Harry winced.

"Harry?" Ron mumbled, sitting up and rubbing his eyes and Harry turned to see him. "You alright, mate?"

"Sorry," Harry whispered. "I couldn't sleep."

Even in the dark room, lit only by the full moon hanging outside the window, Harry could see concern begin to creep across Ron's freckled face. "You look rough."

"Thanks, Ron. You don't look to pretty yourself right now."

"No, I meant you look shaken." His tone was somewhere between irritation and concern. "Why couldn't you sleep?"

Harry shrugged. "No reason." His voice pitched slightly. He cringed.

Ron fixed him with a hard look. "You don't have to lie to me you know," he said. "I remember what it was like after our fourth year. You're having nightmares again, aren't you?"

Harry cast his gaze to the floor, feeling embarrassed. He never had been adept at lying, especially to Ron, but was he really so obvious? Could everyone tell that he was still being haunted by what happened? Or did Ron just know him too well? "They're just dreams now," Harry insisted. "I'm fine, Ron. You don't need to worry."

"Are they really just dreams?" Ron asked. Harry met his gaze again, frustration washing over him in a great wave.

"Of course they're just dreams, Ron!" he snapped. "I defeated Voldemort! They aren't prophetic or coming from the Horcrux! It's over! It's just me having nightmares!"

There was a pregnant pause before Ron finally spoke.

"I didn't mean to imply that You-Know-Who was back," he said carefully. "I only meant- well, I meant to ask if they were nightmares about what happened during all those years."

Harry sighed, regretting his tone and feeling forever grateful with Ron's patience. It wasn't fair for him to have snapped, he knew, not when his friend was only trying to be caring. "Yes," he finally responded. "Yeah, they are."

Once again, there was a pause. It was Ron who broke it once again.

"C'mere," he ordered, scooting over on his bed and lifting the sheets so that there was a clear spot.

Harry nearly choked on his own spit. "I'm sorry?"

"Lay down," Ron said. "I'm worried about you. I want to make sure you to get some sleep. I know you haven't been getting a good amount for days."

Harry opened and closed his mouth, trying to think of how to respond. He hadn't had much experience with friends before he went to Hogwarts, especially not best friends, but he figured this crossed a line. He wanted to say as much, but he felt himself moving before he could give some sort of explanation to Ron. Harry sat down on the mattress and stiffly laid down, his back to his friend.

Ron draped the sheet over Harry and quickly pulled his arm away. "I've seen how tired you've been," he said. "Mum has too. She even asked me to make sure you really were sleeping."

Harry managed a laugh. Molly always had been like that, though it was frankly appreciated. He hadn't had someone to worry about that for the majority of his life.

"Well, I guess you can tell her that I am now," he said. He could feel Ron's body heat, radiating mere inches from him. It was comforting in a way he hadn't expected it to be.

"I already have been," Ron admitted sheepishly.

Harry turned his head sharply over his shoulder, trying to search Ron's face, but the red-head wouldn't meet his gaze. "What?"

"I've been trying to stay up until you fall asleep. And then sleep lightly so I can hear if you wake up or something." He gave a quick chuckle. "That sounds creepy. I promise I'm not trying to be a weirdo."

Harry was unsure how to respond. One the one hand, he knew he should feel uncomfortable with someone watching him sleep. On the other, Ron caring that much made Harry's heart speed up again, but with a strange giddiness rather than panic.

Ron must have interpreted Harry's silence with discomfort. "Forget I said that please," he grumbled.

"It's fine!" Harry said quickly. "I'm just flattered that you would put me before sleep, is all." _Flattered that you care._

"Oh," Ron said lamely.

Harry settled his head back down. "I don't recommend you keep staying up now, though," he warned. "I'm not gonna get back to sleep anytime soon."

"Do you need to talk about anything?" Ron asked. "I don't know if talking about it will help, but-"

"Yes," Harry heard himself say. Gods, he wanted someone to talk about it, and yet he had no one that he could even go to. Sirius, Dumbledor, and Lupin were gone. Hermione had been gone in America with her S.P.E.W campaign and had been so busy that he hadn't wanted to bother her. And Ron was- well, Ron was Ron. As close as they were, Harry had never confided in him alone about his nightmares. And yet here he was, ready to spill it all.

"It's always got Voldemort," Harry started. "If I don't see him, I hear him laughing. But I saw him in tonight's. When Wormtail killed Cedric, and he gained form again, and he used the Cruciatus Curse on me." Harry felt himself shaking, remembering the white-hot pain that had coursed through every nerve at once, understanding how something like that could drive you mad. "It's not always that. Sometimes it's what the dementors reminded me of- when he killed my parents." Tears were filling his eyes, threatening to spill down his cheeks. But he continued. "And when Voldemort sent me those visions of Sirius, and we went to the ministry and Bellatrix killed him."

Ron suddenly shifted closer to Harry, wrapping his arm around his shoulder and chest, pulling him close as if to hug him. "It's okay," Ron murmured. "You don't have to keep telling me."

Harry shook his head and kept going. "And the other one- it's when you wore the Horcrux for too long and you left."

Ron stiffened. "Harry-"

Harry pushed Ron's arm off of him and rolled over, and they were suddenly face-to-face, barely and inch away from each other. Harry swallowed. "Why did you have to leave, Ron?" The tears finally fell. "I know that the Horcrux was influencing you but... it just made whatever I was feeling more intense. Were you already thinking about leaving me? Me and Hermione?"

"Harry..." Ron reached lifted his hand to wipe away one of Harry's tears, but he moved his head away. Ron dropped it. "I didn't want to leave you. Of course I didn't. I was worried about Mum and Dad and Ginny and my brothers."

"I know. That's what you told me." Despite his tears, Harry felt venom seep into his words. "And you told me that I wouldn't understand, because I didn't have people waiting for me like you did. Do you know what that felt like, coming from you?"

"Saying that and leaving is one of my biggest regrets," Ron said, sounding frustrated, but Harry knew even now that his anger that it was directed at himself and not Harry. "I didn't mean it. Of course you have people waiting for you. The same people that were waiting for me."

Another tear rolled down Harry's cheek. This time, as Ron reached up to wipe it away, Harry didn't flinch. Ron's hand lingered, cupping his cheek. Harry's skin tingled a bit at the contact.

"I love my family because they're my family," Ron said. "But you love them because you choose them. And I'm glad you did."

A new feeling fluttered up inside Harry's chest, pushing aside the feeling of betrayal that has filled it minutes ago. It was like the giddiness he had felt earlier, only more intense.

"And I choose you, too," Ron said, his voice suddenly sounding shaky, yet his blue eyes stared right into Harry's green. "I choose you, and... and I love you, Harry."

Harry's heart pounded in his ribcage.

"And... I think it may be different from how I love my family. It's more than that. It's more than something platonic."

Mouth dry, Harry tried to seek out a response. His heart was threatening to leap out of his chest.

Ron turned his head away from Harry, wincing. "I've made it awkward now, haven't I?" he asked. "I'll just- you can sleep on the bed, I'll take your sleeping bag tonight so you can have a mattress-"

"No!" Harry caught his arm as he started to sit up, finally finding his voice. "No, please. Stay. Don't leave again."

His friend didn't move. "You aren't... horrified?"

"Of course not," Harry said, feeling mildly offended, of all things. "Why would I be?"

"Because I just..." Ron struggled to get the words out, even after they had already been laid out. "I just confessed to having _feelings_ for you. And we're best mates. And both men."

Harry, despite fresh tears still clinging to his cheeks, despite knowing that their following this moment could change forever, despite everything, laughed. "You think I care about that?" Harry managed between laughs.

Ron, still frozen, raised his eyebrows. "You mean... you don't have any problem with it at all?" his voice was disbelieving, his expression hopeful. "About... any of it?"

"I care," Harry said. "I care a lot, but not at all in a bad way." He sat up, so that he and Ron were eye to eye. "I'm bisexual, Ron." He grinned at Ron's shocked expression.

"Why did you never tell me?" his best friend asked.

"I haven't told anyone except you," Harry admitted, still smiling. "It feels good to finally say out loud, though. I'm bisexual."

"Wow," Ron said. "I wish I could say that like you can. Just know so positively. I don't know what I am. I just know that I love you."

It was back to the remaining elephant in the room, and the lightness was gone again.

"I'm being serious," Ron said, as if it was needed to clarify. "But... if you're not interested... we can jut forget I ever said anything. I won't bring it up again. I promise."

Harry studied Ron's face for a moment, staring so deep he began to make out constellations in his freckles. He hardly thought the words before he said them, but he meant them so sincerely that he felt not an ounce of regret as they slipped past his lips in a whisper.

"Can I kiss you?"

He watched his Ron's eyes widened a bit before the other boy gave a small, almost weak looking nod.

Harry did not remember Ron leaning forward or him leaning in, but suddenly their lips were connected, tender and sweet and curious. Harry closed his eyes in delight and leaned into Ron's hand, which had raised to hold his cheek. He had not expected his best friend to be this gentle, this giving, but it strangely did not surprise him.

They pulled away at the same time, both quiet. Harry looked into Ron's eyes, seeing the blown out pupils and expecting that he looked much the same.

"I love you too, Ron," Harry said. "I don't know what I'd do without you. I want us to be together."

Ron grinned. "Really?" he asked. "You don't care that we're best friends?"

"I've always heard people say that you should date your best friend," Harry pointed out. "We're lucky enough that we both want that."

"That's corny, mate," Ron said, but he was smiling. "Now then, I hate to be the one to kill whatever mood is going on here, but... we- no, you- should probably get to sleep."

Harry looked away. "I can't, Ron." Fear filled him suddenly. "I'll have nightmares again." He could not watch as Ron left again, not now.

"Don't worry," Ron said. "I'll be right here. I'll punch the nightmares away."

"Now who's corny?" Harry asked, but he felt comforted. He laid down and turn so that his back faced Ron, who draped his arm over him once again and pulled them together so that he was essentially spooning him. The comfort Harry had felt earlier at the close proximity doubled.

"You're mum won't care if she walks in on us like this, will she?" Harry asked, suddenly worried. Had Ron been afraid to tell him because of things his family had conditioned?

Ron gave a snort. "Please. She's betting on it."

Harry laughed, feeling his exahstion finally beginning to catch up to him. "Promise? You won't have moved before I wake up?"

"Promise," Ron agreed. "I won't be leaving again."

Harry let out a sigh, relief filling him. "'Night, Ron." He felt himself beginning to drop off.

"'Night, love," Ron whispered, giving Harry a small squeeze. He nuzzled a bit into Harry's neck.

The giddiness filled Harry's chest one last time before he finally fell into a dreamless sleep.


End file.
